7 Things NOT to Say To A Parent of an Only Child

Let's face it, being a parent now days is tough.  It's tough if you have one child or nineteen.  But why must other parents make us feel bad for our decisions?

So I have one child.  People don't always know the entire circumstances why I have "just one child," but they certainly have an opinion.  Here are some statements I've heard, repeatedly and the comments I would just love to say in return, instead of my more P.C. versions I usually say.

1. "It must be easy."

Um... Ok.  If you think parenting a child in any way is easy.  It's not like she came out of the womb as a perfectly functioning adult, able to take on the world.  She's a child.  She has her moments of greatness and her moments of not so greatness.

2.  "I bet you have a spoiled brat." (Or just spoiled)

Yes, my daughter has had many opportunities that other children just don't have.  But I also know of larger families who have even more stuff or experiences than us.  Life is like that, right?

Now, with that being said, we are teaching our daughter the value of everything she has.  That also means we take things away from her in an instance if her behavior deserves it.

3. "Don't you want another?"

Yes, I did.  At one point, I wanted another child.  But circumstances were not right for us at the time. So we just have our one little gal, and she's amazing.  She completes our family just right.

However, asking me that question is really awkward.  Just like asking another woman when she is going to have kids.  Or asking a dating couple when they are getting married.  Same faux pas!

4.  "Don't the grandparents want more grand babies?"

This is my favorite one!  My husband and I are both only children, so if they wanted more grand babies, they shouldn't have put all their eggs in one basket with us!  Take that mom!

The true answer - no, they absolutely love Avery. They have never pressured us to have more kids (or not have kids).  We have great parents who let us make those decisions for ourselves.

5. "I bet they don't know how to share."

Haha, my daughter can share with the best of them!  Why?  Because she's been in daycare since she was 3 months old, so she just grew up that way.

She also knows that when her friends come over, she's taught to be a great host to her guests.  That includes sharing her toys, food, backyard, and anything else.  If a friend breaks it, well, that's what happens when you invite guests over.  She, luckily, has great picks in friends!

5. "How are they going to take care of you when you are old?"

She better get saving now, huh?  Or get used to us all under one roof because we're moving in when we're 50, just to annoy her!

6.  "I bet you smother them."

I've seen how smothering can harm a person instead of helping them in the long run.  So instead, we work hard on giving her a great balance of dependent and independent.  She still needs us to meet her needs, but she has a great head on her shoulders and is an independent thinker.  That's the perfect balance we are trying to achieve with her - someone who can be a good citizen when she grows up.

7. "Don't they get lonely?"

Absolutely, there are moments of loneliness.  I believe, though, that all kids feel loneliness at times.  However, we surround her with family and friends so she knows she is never truly alone.

So when you run into a mom of one, don't judge, don't be jealous, just be supportive!  She's a mom, raising a kid, with the same trials and tribulations, just like you.

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