so what's up? its wednesday!

What's up?!  It's Wednesday - we're halfway to Fri-yay-day!

I'm spending today answering a few, fun questions about what's going on in my life right now.

What we're eating this week:   With Kevin gone, its been tough making food for just two people. Evidently, I'm used to cooking for a batillion (called Kevin) so small portions are not my gig.  I make one meal and the leftovers last Avery and I five days.  Ugh.  Instead, I would rather order a pizza, or chinese and call it dinner.

But I'm trying to transition back to my high protein, low sugar diet that I went through last October.  It's almost May, and that means bathing suit season will be joining me in exactly 30 days (eek!) so let's trim down the excess and get healthy.

What I'm reminiscing about:   With the distance, I've spent a lot of time looking back on the 12.5 years of my marriage with Kevin.  I'll admit, our first 5 years were rough.  Not rocky road rough, more like climbing Mt. Kilimanjaro rough.   Getting married when you are still kids is rough, then pile on having your own kid, throw in a dab of being a military family and you've got divorce written all over you!  

What they don't know is Kevin and I are some of the stubbornness people you will ever meet, and that has helped us stay married.  Neither one of us wanted to be the first one to quit.  So we didn't. 

See?  We were kids.  But we loved each other.

The past 2 years have been some of our best times in our lives, and even the past 9 months (despite the distance) has been some of the closest moments Kevin and I have shared.  It is amazing what perseverance in the face of adversity can do for a marriage.  We knew this was not the end, not goodbye on our marriage, this was just another challenge, and we've had worse.  It's great to look back on so many of those challenges and be able to say, "ha!  We beat you!"

What I'm loving:  My friends.  Its cliche, yes, but I've really loved my friends who have become my extended family.  I'm so lucky to have so many amazing, supportive people in my life who care so much about Avery, Kevin and I.  For so many years, I've put up walls around me as a defense mechanism because I knew I'd be moving in 2-3 short years.  I didn't want to hurt anyone if I had to say goodbye too soon.  

This time, though, is different. I'm not allowing myself to close off and shut people out.  And because of that, I've met wonderful, great people who I can be myself, my true self around.  

Thank you to those who get me - the crazy, obsessive, never a dull moment, me.

What we've been up to:  We spent last weekend cleaning out my closet and taking it down to a close resemblance to a capsule wardrobe.  While it was certainly hard to part with some items, I realized that these items represent the amazing 12 years of marriage, careers, and memories I've had, but I can't live in guilt by continuing to hold on to them. 

Instead, every piece of clothing has a life cycle.  Sometimes they are shorter than others, sometimes they can go to someone who can use it more than I, and sometimes I just have to say, I spent the money, what's done is done and let go.

It was such a healing process.  I am starting to really simplify my life, and it feels good.

You can read more about this ENTIRE process on yesterday's post - found here.

What I'm watching:  I've been binge watching Friends on Netflix.  I'm in the middle of Season 3.  You know the one:   

Spoiler alert: Ross and Rachel broke up.

I've enjoyed having it on my ipad, so whereever I am in the house (folding laundry, doing my makeup, making dinner, etc), I can have it playing.  What I didn't realize is that I watched it when I was in high school and MAN, there is a lot of adult content.  Where were my parents?

What I'm listening to:  I use the Spotify app, and just play lists on it based on my mood - no joke.  So if I need workout music, I throw on an HITT playlist.  Or if I am at work, there is pop music to work through (8 hours of a playlist).  I don't think about artists or songs or what's hot or not.  I just let Spotify do it for me.  I get alerts from time to time that such list has been updated.  Thank you for keeping me up to date on the latest music without even knowing it.  Its like I'm trendy or something.

What I'm wearing:  I'm still crushing on Le Tote {read all about my crush here}, so I've been using that to get seasonal items (while not adding to my closet - whee!).  I've really loving shift dresses, moto jackets and stiletto heels right now.

Source: LeTote

What I'm doing this weekend:  Looks like I'm hosting a sleepover with 3 of my daughter's friends from school.  I love opening up my house to guests and having squealing girls running around.  When you have just one child it can be a treat to have more voices. I truly enjoy laughter and loudness in my house, something I bet my friends of multiple kids are probably used to by now.  They probably cherish the quiet.

What I'm looking forward to in the next month:  Avery turns 12 next month, so beyond planning for a party, we are planning for her to take more steps in her life.  Each year, she changes dramatically.  This past year has been incredibly hard and as parents, we've put her in a tough position with the distance.  Middle school is hard enough, without having a dad 1200 miles away.

Right after her birthday, we are planning to take a train ride out to California for another big vacation, possibly with surf lessons.  Something she just can't get here in Colorado.  No, this isn't our way of bribing her to like us or make things better, but with the bad memories of loneliness should come some good memories of great times with her dad.  Trust me, when he comes to town, there's still dull moments of doing homework and chores.  She still lives a pretty regular life when he's around.

What else is new:  I'm going to continue simplifying my life and declutter my basement.  We've had boxes that have moved with us for 4 houses now.  Military spouses know what I'm talking about.  They have seen 4 different moving company labels, and yet, you can't remember what exactly is in them....

I'm a bit afraid to open a few of them.  

Some, I suspect will be items that I've bought a duplicate to replace.  Others will be long lost matches to socks from when Avery was 3.  I have contemplated hosting a garage sale and offering them as "mystery boxes" for $5.  Who knows!  That might just be easier!

I feel like Mrs. Incredible: 

"Because I finally unpacked the last box. Now it's official! Ha ha ha! Why do we have so much junk?"

I think the day that I unpack the last box, I will host a big party!  Ya'll are invited!  Don't wait by the mailbox for invitations just yet....

What are you getting your mom for Mother's Day this year?  Since my mom reads my blog religiously (hi mom!) I think I will wait to answer this question, but I will mention that it is currently already sitting at my house.  So extra points for being several weeks early and NOT being a gift card!

My husband is not the best at going to get me gifts for Mother's Day (he's not the obligatory gift giver type), so my kiddo makes it up by making me cards every year.  I do enjoy seeing her handy work get better and better as she grows and her wit gets better too (she writes really funny poems instead of sentimental ones).  Honestly, that's what makes mother's day great for me - Avery handing me a new homemade card, sometimes with a vase of freshly picked tulips from our yard, and seeing her bright smile, all proud of the hours she poured over it. 

So......what are you getting your mom for Mother's Day?  Don't worry!  I won't tell!